I have this intimate complicated relationship with anger. For as long as I can remember, it’s been there, ever present by my side. And for as long as I can remember, I have never fully allowed it to be expressed as a normal emotion worthy of space within me. I would imagine my own expression of anger, of rage as destructive, like a veritable atom bomb of emotion destroying all in my path, including myself.

The term “anxiety'' gets thrown around quite a bit these days. Partially because it’s become more acceptable to openly discuss mental health issues, but also because it seems to be turning into a catch-all for expressions of discomfort.

There is normal anxiety which is intermittent and is expected based on certain events or situations.

I started writing this with a specific memory of what I thought was my first anxiety attack when all of a sudden I remembered a different time from earlier in my life, but I’m inclined to share my starting point nonetheless to help show how this can occur in my sessions with clients – you come in thinking one event is the genesis of the issue, when really it’s much earlier and usually lurking somewhere in the unconscious, waiting for something to unlock it.

Grief is an emotion I’m intimately familiar with.

It can grip you from the inside and feel like it’s tearing your heart and soul to shreds. Surrendering to it can feel like diving into a deep pit with no bottom, only to be swallowed by darkness.

I’ve recently experienced a significant loss; I won’t get into the specifics, but what I do want to share is that I had been holding onto my management of this grief ever so tightly.

What emotion(s) do you avoid at all costs?

Grief? Heartbreak? Sadness? Fear? Guilt? Shame? All of the above?

Maybe you even avoid the "positive" ones so that you can avoid disappointment? Can’t be too happy, too joyful, love too deeply...

When you cut yourself off from fully experiencing these emotional experiences, you stifle the lessons and the growth that takes place as a result.

This Sunday is Summer Solstice 2021 in the Northern Hemisphere, officially peaking at 11:31 p.m. coinciding with National Indigenous Peoples Day on June 21 to wrap up Indigenous Peoples Month. This is a day for all Canadians to recognize and celebrate the unique heritage, diverse cultures and outstanding contributions of First Nations, Inuit and Métis peoples.